I’m serious you guys. Brianne Hogan has written, and is producing, a play about John Mayer titled: “Back To You: A Dear John (Mayer) Letter”. I think this would be really fun to see, I might be able to get down to Los Angeles in June to check out a performance. They’re also performing in Toronto, Canada.

At any rate, here’s the plot straight from the production’s website:

John Mayer’s a Douche Bag. Everyone knows it. He knows it. Tired of his tabloid tenure as Hollywood’s “Mr. Wrong”, he sets out to find his long-lost Japanese summer school love, Rihanna (no, not that one) to right his romantic wrongs. Inevitable hijinks ensue when Rihanna’s pals, Carly and Calvin, learn of their forbidden love and realize their own artistic careers could benefit from a Mayer-iffic meeting, and do everything in their power to make it happen—even if it means creating a “Heartbreak Warfare.”

Cameos by Chinnifer and Chestica and a special YouTube performance!

*This is NOT a true story. But it should be.

*John Mayer has no association with this play. But he should.

Also check out their website for the show dates & times and ticket information.